Soft place to fall. Who is God?

I was laying in bed at some point during the night thinking.  Scary thought, yes I know…..then something came to mind that I haven’t thought of in a long time.  Something that I used to be very aware of and understood. Who is God?

I once heard the more one tries to live their life the “right” way, the more obstacles will be thrown in their way to influence them to make what could be the wrong choices.  I believe that we just don’t “disappear” when our physical body dies.  I believe in heaven and hell.  I just don’t know exactly what the process is to get there…process meaning what actually happens to the soul.  But really, who is God?

Some believe that there will be a portion of time where the soul will be “sleeping” until Christ returns…(Christian beliefs).  I have also heard that some go directly to heaven, or the fire pit.  As well as some who believe the soul/spirit stays around whatever plane is close to us, while we are still a living breathing human being.  I don’t know what is what.  I know what I have experienced and that’s enough to make me believe that there is A LOT we do not know or understand.  I do believe that we are surrounded by good and bad.  And that we can be influenced either way by many different sources.  

My point being, that if I am striving to do better, and making progress in that area, then I believe there is the possibility of bad influences becoming more prevalent.  Some might call it karma, what goes around comes around, temptation, stupidity…whatever.  I just think it’s important to pay attention, not let your guard down, because that’s when I, personally, will fall.  In my experience, when I fall, it’s really hard, and I do and say things that could ruin a good thing.  If I pray, and ask for guidance and do a daily inventory of my thought process and actions, I’ll find that I am calmer, and more prepared for those attempts to allow me to fall prey to my weakness’.  I’ve said so many times that understanding or being able to understand is soooooo important to me. If I can’t understand why I do things, or why someone else does things, then I can’t react accordingly.  Or, I can’t help in a way that will be positive and beneficial to others. Whatever that reason may be, I feel like I need to try my very best everyday, and honestly, I haven’t been doing that.

To the ones I love, and that love me,  I’m sorry…I promise I’ll do better.

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